My Annual Values Evaluation

Making to-do lists is my natural state. It didn't occur to me how natural this is for me until my COVID-quaranteam started teasing me about it. They now expect a DDD (Daily Dose of Debbie) in the morning via WhatsApp of pod decisions and schedules for the week or day.

I set to-do lists and goals for the month, the week, the day, and even just the rare but treasured free 45 minutes on my calendar. To really drive the point home, I find the pomodoro technique a perfectly fun topic of conversation for happy hour. It's bad, friends.

This natural list-making instinct can be helpful only if it's focused on the right things. As my boys grow and stretch upwards by the minute, time only seems to be speeding up, even in a slower-paced COVID world, and the looming to-do list can be a distraction from the most joyful and fleeting moments of parenthood.

As time flies by, my annual planning process, or rather, my annual values evaluation, helps me focus on the right things. Instead of resolutions, I think about my habits (perhaps the wiser, cooler friend of a resolution) and what is most important to me in the year ahead, based on the life I want to lead and the values I hold most important. 

Since 2015, I have tried different frameworks for this largely inspired by recommendations from Tim Ferris and Gretchin Rubin. I have been as specific as using a spreadsheet to create monthly goals, to zooming out and thinking about just one theme for the year. Five years into trying different techniques, here are the questions I find most helpful in reflecting on and clarifying my values and intent for the year -- my annual values evaluation.

1. What routines/behaviors served you well in the past year?

2. What routines/habits did not serve you in the past year?

3. What is important to get right in 2021?

4. This time next year, what would you like to have accomplished that you feel was a worthwhile use of time?

5. What key word or theme do you want to keep in mind for the year?

6. What do you want to be known for? (Yes, this is a biggy. And I do mean what in life, not just in 2021. It's helpful to revisit this each year. )

One week into 2021 and I can tell you that the above questions have already served me well. Revisiting my past answers to, ‘What do you want to be known for?’ is immediately clarifying and tunes out the noise of most other things. Rather than serve as a reminder of all the things I want to achieve, it serves more as an anti-to-do list and a reminder to slow down and be present with those I hold dear.

With the question, "What will be a worthwhile use of time this year?" I thought about the year if Paul and I just followed our existing momentum of parenthood, careers, staying healthy, etc. The list of answers was, in fact, already packed! I needed to be realistic about whether anything new could fit! (But for me, spending more time doing art still made the list even if it will be at the expense of something else.) 

The question, "What key word or theme do you want to keep in mind for the year?" has already served me many times. Last year I chose "discovery". This year I’ve chosen "lightness". "Lightness" has been a helpful anchor when I have found myself reacting to, literally, spilled milk, or a broken coffee pot. Lightness was a helpful reminder when reading the news of the week -- the storming of the US Capitol -- and how I want to respond to things that are well beyond my individual or immediate control.

For better or worse, I have a feeling 2021 will feel like a year of great significance. And in that significance, I hope to find lightness. 

I hope the above can be of help as you clarify what lies ahead and what you can control in 2021. 

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P.S. The longer version of my ‘Annual Values Evaluation’ includes a look-back on the previous year. For those interested in my full process, here are the other questions I think through before thinking ahead.

1. What were 3-5 highlights of the year? (I do this first without looking at pictures, and then use pictures as a prompt)

2. Who were 3-5 new people that came into your life this year? What have you learned from them?

3. What did you learn about yourself this year that can serve you well in the future?

4. What were the books/podcasts that were meaningful to you this year?

5. How are you doing, in health, family, career, contribution, financial wellness, relationships and fun? (Add any others important to you)

Would love to hear what questions have been helpful for you.