Silliness, Losing Steam & Stress Eating
Social distancing at Lake Nojiri, Japan.
Last week, I wrote about lessons learned in our second week of distance learning in Japan (much to your encouragement). And oh, how much can change in a week! Most of you are dealing with the realities of ‘lockdown’, canceled schools and totally different routines. Of course you are stressed. And you’re in the thick of the unknown and learning how to cope.
As we close out our third week of distance learning, here’s what I’ve learned in the hopes that it can continue to help.
First, the situations in the US and Europe look and feel quite different than in Japan. Spring has arrived, parks are full, people are running errands and dining out and going to work. Schools and museums are closed but much of life feels largely the same. We have received no direction from the government on social distancing or 'lockdown'. And from what we can tell, hospitals are not inundated and there has not been a spike in cases. In absence of more data or guidance from the government, we are left anxiously wondering whether this is a purposeful approach, or a lack of management. A relative lack of English news leaves us in the dark with our fingers crossed. This is not my preferred state of being.
Back to the things we can control … like working with our children while school is closed and creating a culture at home that we are proud of. Here’s what's new for my family this week:
Silliness is hugely powerful.
Silliness is the antidote to stress. And kids are very responsive to both. When in doubt, choose silliness.
It gets easier .... before it gets harder again.
With routine and expectations comes a greater sense of calm. I dare say you may even hit your stride. I hit my stride … and then lost it again. More on that below.
We’ve cut learning time in half.
In my post last week, I said it took us 4-5 hours/day to 'co-learn' and complete the assignments from school. We've cut that time in half. This is in part because we are more efficient and have a routine, like ‘showing up’ for school at 9am. The other part… and the majority of it… is because we are over it. The adrenaline and excitement of distance learning has worn off and in the effort to keep learning fun, I choose to not always work toward completion. (FYI the guidelines from our school say 20-25 minutes per subject for 2nd graders.)
What worked this week won't work next week.
We have spring break next week which will introduce less routine, but also less responsibilities. When we return to distance learning I know what worked for us weeks 1-3 will likely not work weeks 5 and beyond. I’ll need to get more creative on unconventional (and silly) ways to learn.
Must. eat. snacks.
Three weeks in and I definitely have a snacking problem. And no energy to modify the behavior at the moment. Stress snacking hurts so good. See you 10 pounds from now.
You know your family best.
There are a lot of ideas and schedule templates circulating for school-at-home learning. From the outside, these color coded charts and timetables are so uniquely American. If these work for your family, then fabulous. You know your family best. For my family, we aim to do the hardest things first in the morning. For my son, this is writing. After a morning of learning, Liam has an unstructured day where he gets to choose, knowing that Mom will need computer time. His favorite indoor activity has been making homemade baseball cards.
Distance learning is a helluva lot more work for teachers.
I think we all have a renewed appreciation for how hard a teacher's job really is. Distance learning compounds all the normal challenges and requires a completely different curriculum. If you haven't yet, send a motherload sized wave of virtual gratitude to your teachers.
And some lessons learned Weeks 1 & 2 are ringing more true than ever. Emotions are contagious. Instill a love of learning rather than stressing performance. Some days I am the parent I want to be. Some days ... not so much. But I keep trying.
As always, I hope this helps. And I hope you find your own silliness and yummy snacks as you navigate all of this. Keep on trying your best and thinking of you all!